Not Alone
by Estee111
Summary: When Thorin left the Blue Mountains he also left someone behind...and she was not too happy about it. So much so that she decided to take matters into her own hands and track him down. Now Thorin and the Company must continue their quest with a new member, and as we all know many difficulties lie ahead. Character focused ThorinxOC.
1. Too Long

_Howdy y'all! So this is going to be a long one! Lots of character development and will go all the way to the BoFA...and maybe after...? Definitely movie-verse here but I always go back to the book for details. Every review gets a party thrown in its honor and I always respond, whether it's praise or criticism. _

_Now onto the story!_

_Enjoy!_

* * *

"Are you sure we did the right thing by leaving like that? Without Gandalf?"

"Yes, Master Baggins," Thorin replied shortly. "He knew the elves would try to stop us. He wanted us to continue without him."

The Company had just left Rivendell and were making their way to the High Pass through the Misty Mountains. The mountain rage loomed large in the east and Biblo figured it would only be a day or two before they reached it and would have to start climbing.

"Did he tell you when he would be joining us again?" Bilbo wondered.

"No and it does not matter. We cannot wait for him. Durin's Day draws closer and we have no time to lose." Thorin said with finality. The hobbit's questions were grating on his nerves.

"I've lost count of how many times he has said that since we left the Shire," Kili muttered to Fili, the two brothers at the tail end of the pack. As they were the youngest and had the sharpest senses Thorin placed them there so they could keep their eyes and ears on the path behind them.

"I wager he says it at least five more times before we reach the Pass," Fili muttered back.

"How many coins?"

"Five. One for each time."

"Excellent." The two brothers shook hands to seal the deal.

"I do hope we will be stopping for lunch soon," Bombur announced from the middle of the pack a few minutes later. "We ate nothing before leaving the elves and it is almost midday!"

Everyone continued walking but all eyes looked at Thorin as they waited for an answer.

He did not want to stop but he was getting hungry and once they reached the Pass there might not be any good places to stop and rest. With a heavy breath he halted and turned to face the company.

"We will stop here to eat but cannot linger too long. Oin! Gloin! Get a fire going!"

The Company released a collective sigh of relief as they had all be hungry for some time now and swiftly went about preparing the meal.

Thorin made a quick survey of their spot and decided it would be safe enough. There were several large boulders nearby they could rest against and the trees and bushes surrounding them were thick enough to provide sufficient cover.

He looked over at his nephews and saw that they had stretched out against one of the rocks and were lighting their pipes instead of helping the others.

"Fili! Kili!" He called over to them. "Don't forget that you must-"

But he could not finish his sentence as something jumped out from a thick bush to his right and pushed him onto his back. A second later there was a hand pressing his cheek into the ground and a thin blade against his throat. A pair of strong legs straddled his but he dared not fight them lest the blade lunged forward.

Thorin could not discern much from the corner of his eye but he could see a hooded head and a form much smaller than he expected.

The rest of the Company scrambled to grab their weapons but once they had them in hand there was nothing they could do, for their leader was at the mercy of the hooded attacker.

There was a brief moment of silence and stillness before a voice came from within the heavy hood.

"Thorin Oakenshield, you are dead!" It hissed out. Then with a fast tilt of the head the hood fell back as the assailant revealed themselves.

Everyone gasped.

"Reya!" Fili and Kili yelled in unison then dropped their weapons.

"What?!" Thorin growled, hoping he had misheard the name his nephews shouted.

"Hello lads. Any last words for your uncle before I slash his throat?" The woman named Reya asked Fili and Kili casually as she tightened her grip on the sword she was holding against Thorin's neck.

The dwarf on the ground, now recognizing the voice above him, turned from fearful to angry in an instant and began to struggle against his restraints.

"Reya! What in Mahal's name are you doing here?" He barked out, his temper quickly rising.

"Have you not been listening Thorin? I'm here to kill you," she replied cheerfully.

"Do not mock me! And how dare you threaten me in such a way?!"

"Do not worry. You have heirs," Reya tilted her head in the direction of Fili and Kili.

Thorin was trying to get loose but he could not throw himself about too much because joking or not she still held a blade to his throat.

Bilbo did not know what to do as he watched the scene unfold. He thought they should help Thorin but was very confused when the rest of the dwarves appeared to relax somewhat when they learned the woman's name and did nothing to intervene.

"Enough of this Reya! Let me up!" Thorin demanded.

"No! You don't deserve it," Reya spat out.

"And why not?"

"Because you left me!" she yelled.

There was stillness again as Thorin stopped struggling at her words. The only sounds were those of Reya's heavy breathing.

"You left me," she said again but is a softer, sadder tone.

Then, with a long sigh, she relaxed her stance and retracted her weapon from his throat and her hand from his face. She backed away from Thorin without taking his eyes off him as he quickly got off the ground and came to stand in front of her.

Biblo took in her appearance and was surprised by what he saw. Standing she was much shorter than he anticipated, probably around his own height. She was stalkier than a hobbit but not as much as a dwarf and her black hair was braided along the top of her head then down her side. She wore tight trousers and a leather traveling dress beneath her cloak and had light boots on her feet. Bilbo also saw a bow and a quiver full of arrows on her back which he had not noticed earlier. He took in her entire appearance several times before it dawned on him that the woman standing there was not in fact a woman but a dwarf! A female dwarf!

The hobbit then looked at the leader of the company and saw that his shoulders were tense and that his fists were clenching at his sides.

Thorin was torn.

His anger was still flaring because of her assault but his heart was also melting at the sight of her. Part of him wanted to yell and curse at her for being there while another part wanted to pull her close and never let her go.

"What are you doing here?" He questioned her. He was not shouting like before but his voice was still tense.

"You are in no position to be asking questions Thorin," she replied, the same tension lacing her voice.

"How did you get here?"

'"I tracked you."

"Mahal!" Thorin groaned. "All the way from the Blue Mountains?"

"Why do you think it took me so long to find you?"

"You shouldn't have been looking for me in the first place!"

"What else was I supposed to do?!" Reya took a step forward as she said this. "I wake up alone in your bed without so much as a note telling me where you have gone! I stupidly look for you for an hour before one of your advisers kindly informs me that you have left with no idea when you would return! I then go to find Fili and Kili hoping they have some answers only to find out that they are gone as well! Tell me Thorin, what was I supposed to do instead of go looking for you?"

Thorin was stunned by her speech for a moment before regaining his composure.

"You should have stayed in the Blue Mountains like any other sensible dwarf would have."

"Come Thorin! We both know I am not sensible, for if I was I would not have allowed myself to fall in love with you!" Reya knew her words were harsh but she wanted him to suffer, if only a little bit, so he could know of all the pain he had caused her over the past months.

Thorin was stung by her words and almost said something insulting back when he remembered that they were before the company. He turned to look at them and saw how uncomfortable they were. If he was going to continue his conversation with Reya he did not want to do it in front of them.

He turned back to look at her and saw that she noticed the same thing he did. She immediately pivoted on her heels and began to walk away from him. Thorin could only assume that she wanted him to follow so he did.

When Reya believed they were out of sight and out of earshot of the others the stopped and moved to face him again. He was close to her, closer than before, and she could feel something invisible pulling her towards him.

She was still furious with Thorin but also missed him more than she could say. Her anger and her love for him were molding together in her head and it was confusing her.

Without thinking too much she went to him and wrapped her arms around his neck and she pressed her lips to his. Thorin did not hesitate to return her kiss and bring his own arms around her waist. Their mouths pressed hard together and their tongues danced around each other as all of their longing poured into the kiss.

They ended the kiss after some time but remained in each other's arms, neither ready to let go yet.

"I'm still mad at you," Reya mumbled into his chest.

"I know."

"And you have a lot of explaining to do."

"As do you," Thorin said then kissed the top of her head.

"I know," Reya sighed but made no motion to move, content to have his arms around her for the time being.

It had been far too long.


	2. Clarification

_Here's the next one! Reviews are loved and read with eagerness._

_Enjoy!_

* * *

By the time Reya and Thorin rejoined the others there was already a fire burning and food cooking. Everyone looked up at them when they came into view but said nothing as they did not know how the conversation between them had gone.

Reya broke some of the tension when she nodded at each dwarf and greeted them by name. When she came up to Balin she also gave him a long hug and he patted her shoulder gently.

Fili and Kili gave Reya questioning looks when she came to sit by them around the fire.

"Don't worry lads, he's not sending me away," she said answered their silent inquiry.

Thorin, leaning against one of the large rocks, scoffed loudly as he lit his pipe.

"Don't be rude Thorin," Reya scolded. Thorin shook his head but kept his eyes on her. He had not forgotten how beautiful she was and could not get enough of looking at her, even though he would rather she not be there.

"Why would he send you away?" Biblo spoke suddenly, still very confused about the entire situation and curious to learn more about the dwarf woman who was apparently Thorin's...well, he was not sure was she was to Thorin but he wanted to find out.

Reya looked to see the source of the question and when her eyes landed on Biblo she studied him for a moment. While tracking them she had wondered why the Company had gone through the Shire and now she had her answer.

"He would send me away because he thinks this quest is too dangerous for me to be on but he cannot send me away because he believes that if I were to go back on my own I would perish in some horrible way. It makes very little sense considering that I have made it this far all on my own and in one piece, so a short answer to your question, Master Hobbit, is that he is afraid."

When she finished speaking Bilbo's eyebrows shot up and he and some of the dwarves looked to their leader to see how he would handle such a statement. Thorin's grip on his pipe tightened at her words but he said nothing. Reya quickly glanced back at him with a smirk then turned her attention back to Bilbo.

"May I ask your name?"

"Bilbo. Bilbo Baggins," he nodded politely at her.

"A pleasure to meet you Mr. Baggins. I am Reya, as you've heard."

"You are a dwarf?" Bilbo blurted out before he could stop himself. He was almost certain she was but wanted to make sure.

Reya chuckled before responding.

"Yes I am. I come from the Blue Mountains like the others in this Company."

"You...you...ahem. You don't look very much like a dwarf," Biblo observed, his curiosity overcoming his embarrassment. He had heard that female dwarves had beards but Reya's face was clear of any hair.

"Aye, I was thinking the same lass," Dwalin chimed in. "Where is your beard? Not that you ever had much of it."

This time Reya laughed.

"I got rid of it right before I left to find you all. I couldn't run around Middle Earth looking as I did. Far too conspicuous," Reya explained.

"Why conspicuous?" Bilbo asked.

"Female dwarves rarely venture out of the mountains and settlements, and when they do it is only because of great need," Balin clarified.

"There are not many of them among our race so they are protected," Oin elaborated.

"So it would be most unusual to see a female dwarf out and about, especially on her own," Bofur added.

"Did anyone recognize you?" Kili asked.

"No, I don't think so. I was mistaken for a very short woman on several occasions and a hobbit once I got near the Shire but never once called a dwarf. I stayed hidden as much as I could."

"The only wise thing you did," Thorin said sourly from him position as he put out his pipe and walked towards the place he and Reya emerged from earlier. The shock of Reya's appearance had worn off and he was beginning to realize what it meant for her to be there with him. He could not take any more mild conversation in that moment. He needed to think.

When Reya saw him leave she rolled her eyes but knew she needed to follow.

"Excuse me lads," she said as she got up. When she leaned forward her braid fell over her shoulder and Bilbo could see a large silver bead and its end. The pattern on it looked familiar and a second later he remembered where he had seen them before. The same beads hung on Thorin's two braids.

With a few quick steps Reya was gone and the Company was silent as they stared at the fire, Bombur the only one moving as he prepared the stew cooking over the flame.

Biblo looked around himself and shifted in his sit, curiosity eating away at him. He realized that he was the only one who did not know about Thorin and Reya and he wanted to find out more details. He had a feeling Reya joining the quest would have a strong effect on the Company and an even a stronger one on Thorin and he wanted to know why.

He slowly stood and went to sit by Balin. He seemed close to Reya and would most likely be willing to give him some answers.

"Balin," he said uneasily.

"Yes laddie?"

"Who exactly is she?"

"That is not an easy question to answer," Balin sighed.

"Is Reya Thorin's wife?"

"No. They are not married. But they should be."

"Are they betrothed?"

"No, but they should be." Balin puffed on his pipe.

"But they are... together?" Bilbo asked as he awkwardly brought his hands together then apart several times.

"Yes. Have been for some years."

"Is that why she has his bead in her hair?"

"Very observant Master Baggins," Balin said, impressed, but did not provide any more information.

"So they are together but not betrothed or married as they should be?"

"Yes."

Bilbo did not know what other questions to ask without being too intrusive and was about to give up when Fili came to his aid.

"Uncle will not marry Reya unless Erebor is reclaimed."

"Why not?"

"He has not told."

Bilbo looked at Fili expectantly but when he young dwarf said nothing Bilbo was starting to think he would never get a full explanation.

He continued to stare at Fili with wide eyes when another voice spoke up.

"Most dwarves never get married," Gloin said gruffly from his perch on a rock, "And if they do, it is because the other dwarf is more important to them than anything else," he spoke from experience, being the only one with a wife in the group.

"What do you mean?" Bilbo was becoming more confused by the second.

"He means just that. Dwarves love and marry once and only when the one they love is more treasured than any possession," Balin elucidated.

"Does Thorin not love Reya?"

"Of course he does. It might not be clear now but when they were in the Blue Mountains together there was never any doubt," Dwalin said.

"Then according to Gloin this makes no sense! Why can he not marry her?"

"He cannot marry her because she is not his most treasured possession," Balin said slowly. "Thorin is so focused on the dragon and Erebor that he cannot devote himself to her as he should. Right now, she is not the most precious to him," he said, his expression saddening.

"If she's not then what is?" Bilbo was getting more drawn in with every word.

Balin looked at his brother then at Fili and Kili before shrugging his shoulders and directing all of his focus on his pipe.

The conversation was then ended and Bilbo contemplated everything he was told.

A minute later Bombur announced that the stew was ready and the Company hungrily filled their bowls.

* * *

"Thorin, we agreed," Reya said as she came up behind him.

"I've changed my mind. You cannot come with us."

"You said that before."

"I mean it this time. I cannot have you here. You will be a distraction neither I or the Company can afford to have."

"I will not be a distraction. And I won't leave you," Reya said defiantly.

Thorin's temper cracked at this and he sharply spun around to face her. He grabbed her by the shoulders and pulled her close so their faces were mere inches apart.

"As your king I command you to return to the Blue Mountains," he said firmly, his eyes never leaving hers.

But Reya was not perturbed by his attempt at dominance.

"You know such words from you will have no effect on me Thorin," she said softly.

He let her go with a heavy breath then took a few steps away. Reya watched him look at the trees around them before speaking.

"Let me help you Thorin," she almost pleaded.

"What help can you provide this quest? The odds are already stacked against us."

"I am not talking about the quest. I am talking about you."

Thorin snapped his head back at her and his eyes turned dark. Reya stood her ground.

"There is another reason you don't want me to come other than your fear that I will get hurt. I know what you do not want me to see but I can help you if you let me."

"What are you talking about? What do I not want you to see?" Thorin was weary of where the conversation was heading.

"You want the Arkenstone more than you want me," she said simply, her face expressionless even though the words she spoke cut at her heart.

Thorin inhaled sharply. He did not know what to say.

"I have seen your mind turn to it more and more over the years. Before you left it was all you talked about when we were together," Reya said quietly.

Thorin only stared at her.

"I knew you would eventually decide to reclaim the mountain, I just didn't think you would leave without so much as a word."

"Reya-"

"No need to say anything Thorin. I know you love me."

His shoulders sagged and his head dropped. It was too late to lie to her and tell her that he could live happily in the Blue Mountains with her. She already saw right through him.

When he lifted his head she was beside him and without hesitation he pulled her into a fierce embrace. Thorin buried his face in her hair as Reya placed several small kisses along his jaw.

"You are not your father or your grandfather," she whispered in his ear. "You will get through this. You are strong."

Thorin pulled back to look at her face. He ran his fingers across her cheek and her lips then kissed her.

"I do not deserve you," he mumbled when they pulled apart.

"If you didn't I would not be here," she mumbled back.

"I cannot convince you to go back?"

"You already know the answer my love."

Thorin hugged her close again. He knew she would not be a physical burden if she joined them. She was light on her feet and skilled with a bow and blade; he and her father and taught her well. He was certain, however, that she would be a burden on his mind.

He left her because he could not love her as much as he did when his mind was so often and so greatly consumed by Erebor and the Arkentsone. He realized some time back that he and Reya could not have a complete life together unless he sought and found retribution for what Smaug did all those years ago. His happiness with her would always be competing with the shadow of the mountain and the dark smoke of the past.

He hated to admit it but his mind was turning for the worse, almost always fixating on the treasure within the Lonely Mountain. It took great effort but Thorin eventually told Reya his fears. She soothed them away as much as she could, reminding him that he could keep himself from succumbing to the Dragon Sickness if he wanted to, but this was easier said than done. As much as he wished to only think of her and his people and family prospering in the Blue Mountains he could not.

That was why he did not marry her after all this time, why he had been ashamed and unable to tell her where he was going the day he left her. The thought of her as his wife and the picture of her swelling with his child were very appealing to him but recently only a dim light in comparison to the shine of the Arkenstone. Thorin hated himself for thinking so but he could not help it. He would either have Erebor and Reya, or neither of them. Such was the logic of a sick mind.

He now realized she knew this and yet she had traveled for miles to find him. She loved him despite of everything.

He understood then that he had to let her continue with him. If he could not love her properly he at the very least owed her the right to love him as she saw fit, even if it meant risking her life. He would of course protect her with every fiber of his being, but there would be no guarantee that they would both survive.

He still held her close when he spoke again.

"I cannot make any promises to you."

"I know," she said.

"The purpose of this quest is to reclaim Erebor from Smaug. We must reach the mountain before Durin's Day."

"Then we better hurry," Reya smiled up at him then kissed the tip of his nose as she pulled him back towards the Company. Thorin followed, hoping that this would not be a mistake and that he could successfully continue on the quest with her by his side.

Reya was unsure as well as he led Thorin back to the others. She did not know if she would actually be able to help Thorin overcome the sickness that was devouring his mind bit by bit, but she _was_ certain that she would die trying.


End file.
